I recently celebrated my wedding anniversary. I will not say the exact anniversary number but I will say that I have now been married to my beautiful wife more years than I was single. And most of those married years we have been business owners.
Marriage has it’s own challenges. But owning and operating a business while being married OR owning a business with your spouse creates a whole new set of interesting challenges.
Being married AND a business owner can be a lethal double-edged sword that can slay dragons when it is used properly. Or you could cause permanent damage if the sword is misused.
My wife and I have written a few marriage books and facilitated some marriage seminars and classes, but I would not consider myself an expert. I do love and cherish my wife and most would consider that an accomplishment after so many years and experiences.
I do see entrepreneurs and business owners struggle with balancing relationships, family and business. It can be difficult to be 100% committed to your business, your spouse, your hobbies, your college buddies, etc… At some point you must prioritize and focus on the most important things in your life.
This article is written to share some tips that I have found helpful over the years as it relates to being a hard charging entrepreneur without charging over your spouse. I think we would all agree that it would not be rewarding to create a successful business and wealth only to realize we are living with a stranger, or worse, that we have no one to share our great life and success with.
I do need to provide the disclaimer that these tips are from my male perspective. They are not meant to sound sexist even though some people may now call me old-fashioned. I can only share what has worked for me:
Tip # 1 – Communicate
It is not fair to my wife for me to be on the phone for hours during the day or communicating with business associates and clients and then not talk to her. Let your spouse know what is going on with you. Ask what is going on with her. Be there when you are communicating with your spouse. Do your best to not let your mind wander to the business issues that may be stuck in your head. That’s not fair to your business or your spouse.
Tip #2 – Don’t communicate everything
My wife likes to know what is going on in our business, but I try to protect her from the garbage – bad clients, legal challenges, etc... Call me old fashioned but I think that men need to protect their wives from most of the negative stuff. Be especially careful not to use your spouse just to dump all the problems on her at the end of the day. She will never be excited about your business if you are constantly whining and complaining.
Tip # 3 – Date your wife
Do I really need to say anything about this? Keep the excitement and anticipation going that both of you felt when you were dating. Schedule some fun things that both of you can be excited about. Remember how much of a salesman you were when you dated? Treat her like a high value client.
Tip # 4 – Get away
Go away for a night or two or longer if possible. Just the two of you. Not a family get away. It is amazing how the stress levels in the house will go down when you take your spouse away for a “funnymoon.” Our children are now grown and on their own, but when they were younger we would steal away for a night or 2 every few months and those breaks were like a pressure valve relieving the stress that had built up in the home.
Tip # 5 – Be a success
I have promised my wife the moon so many times she probably thinks she married an astronaut. While we succeed (and fail) together, I will do all that I can to insure that Our Home, Inc is a success. When both spouses work together for this success, it is a win for the business and the home and the relationship. Don’t assume that everything has been or will be a perfect journey. Everyone experiences bumps in the road. We have had 2 big-time business failures but we have moved forward and learned from our mistakes and our relationship became stronger due to the experience. But the goal is still working towards successfully achieving our goals together.
I invite you to share your marriage tips in the comments below.
Marriage has it’s own challenges. But owning and operating a business while being married OR owning a business with your spouse creates a whole new set of interesting challenges.
Being married AND a business owner can be a lethal double-edged sword that can slay dragons when it is used properly. Or you could cause permanent damage if the sword is misused.
My wife and I have written a few marriage books and facilitated some marriage seminars and classes, but I would not consider myself an expert. I do love and cherish my wife and most would consider that an accomplishment after so many years and experiences.
I do see entrepreneurs and business owners struggle with balancing relationships, family and business. It can be difficult to be 100% committed to your business, your spouse, your hobbies, your college buddies, etc… At some point you must prioritize and focus on the most important things in your life.
This article is written to share some tips that I have found helpful over the years as it relates to being a hard charging entrepreneur without charging over your spouse. I think we would all agree that it would not be rewarding to create a successful business and wealth only to realize we are living with a stranger, or worse, that we have no one to share our great life and success with.
I do need to provide the disclaimer that these tips are from my male perspective. They are not meant to sound sexist even though some people may now call me old-fashioned. I can only share what has worked for me:
Tip # 1 – Communicate
It is not fair to my wife for me to be on the phone for hours during the day or communicating with business associates and clients and then not talk to her. Let your spouse know what is going on with you. Ask what is going on with her. Be there when you are communicating with your spouse. Do your best to not let your mind wander to the business issues that may be stuck in your head. That’s not fair to your business or your spouse.
Tip #2 – Don’t communicate everything
My wife likes to know what is going on in our business, but I try to protect her from the garbage – bad clients, legal challenges, etc... Call me old fashioned but I think that men need to protect their wives from most of the negative stuff. Be especially careful not to use your spouse just to dump all the problems on her at the end of the day. She will never be excited about your business if you are constantly whining and complaining.
Tip # 3 – Date your wife
Do I really need to say anything about this? Keep the excitement and anticipation going that both of you felt when you were dating. Schedule some fun things that both of you can be excited about. Remember how much of a salesman you were when you dated? Treat her like a high value client.
Tip # 4 – Get away
Go away for a night or two or longer if possible. Just the two of you. Not a family get away. It is amazing how the stress levels in the house will go down when you take your spouse away for a “funnymoon.” Our children are now grown and on their own, but when they were younger we would steal away for a night or 2 every few months and those breaks were like a pressure valve relieving the stress that had built up in the home.
Tip # 5 – Be a success
I have promised my wife the moon so many times she probably thinks she married an astronaut. While we succeed (and fail) together, I will do all that I can to insure that Our Home, Inc is a success. When both spouses work together for this success, it is a win for the business and the home and the relationship. Don’t assume that everything has been or will be a perfect journey. Everyone experiences bumps in the road. We have had 2 big-time business failures but we have moved forward and learned from our mistakes and our relationship became stronger due to the experience. But the goal is still working towards successfully achieving our goals together.
I invite you to share your marriage tips in the comments below.
Tim Winders has over 25 years experience as a business owner, entrepreneur, coach and consultant. He founded Accelerate Growth NOW to provide business owners with the training, coaching and resources to double, triple and 10X their business. To learn more and to claim your FREE business growth resources, visit AccelerateGrowthNOW.com.